A couple of weeks ago, I made this blog thinking that I would actually sit down every week and write something, something that would help me figure out the real me. Something that would be so pure, as if it won't even be from this world. It was the beginning of a new year, 2010, and I didn't want to let another year just pass me by, I wanted to grab it and hold on to it...as if I wanted to stop time...make it still. So I'd never have to cry, so I'd never have to let go again so I can keep it forever and never feel an emotion ever again.
Anxiously, I made this blog. Then came the reality crash, I took a pen and some paper and thought about what I was going to write in my first post, thousands of words, thousands of emotions, situations, possibilities, reality and worst of all a blank sheet of paper.
Staring at it for hours, i gave up. The silence of my heart disturbed my mind.
Realizing what had just happened, I stepped out to get some fresh air and perhaps, find a voice inside of me. The breeze whispered in my ears as it blew my hair back. I stood there, searching, looking for a meaning to me...an answer to the questions that follow me since my first breath. Was i really going to find a definition in the clouds that were looking for a direction themselves, or the darkness of the night that was waiting for some light to hide into, or the wind that blew only on those that came in its way? Or was it all just a stupid attempt?
IS THERE REALLY A MEANING TO ME? IS THERE A REASON WHY I DO THE THINGS I DO??
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)